Lives in Colchester

SWF in over-paid job seeks dumpy neurotic for shouting matches, tepid sex, and co-dependency. I enjoy smoking drugs, drinking copious amounts of alcohol, petty theft, pornography, and self-righteous indignation. I spend a lot of time yelling at little kids that step on my lawn. I like to run with scissors. I am the kinda girl that won't play by the rules of society. I have middling intelligence but try to appear cleverer by affecting a posh air, memorizing pointless quotes of classical works, and chuckling at my own mean-spirited, agenda-driven jokes. I'm 30, but look 52 and feel 69. I'm not holding my breath, but I am looking for interesting conversation with someone that will not have to be quoted later on in a courtroom.

I joke of course. In actual fact I am originally from Cardiff in Wales, hence a welsh lilt to the accent. Now settling down in Essex after working for Royal Caribbean cruises for the last 3 years. I am an especially happy go lucky, fun loving girl who loves to laugh and enjoy life. I love a good night out, as well as a good night in. I work in the health and beauty industry (which is more interesting than it sounds) so I like to take care of myself as well as others. I love to travel and explore new things yadda yadda yadda...... In short, I am looking for a kind hearted guy with a great sense of humour who can handle me...